God Is In Your There Moments!
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not be faint. (Isaiah 40:29-31 NIV) God is in your there moments of life. A nugget as I like to call them that has been dropped into my spirit more than once over the weekend. I contemplated sharing or writing about this past week’s experience for various reasons. One of the reasons is because I was ashamed that one of the events happened and carried guilt with me. The second is because the delivery of the news hit my momma heart hard. They both did. Mostly the reason I did not share anything on social media is because the enemy himself had me in my head convincing me that people are tired of hearing about my struggles and this journey with Carston. The enemy went as far to remind me of a conversation I had with someone I once looked up telling me that they no longer pray for Carston and I because they believe his healing is a finished work. This is something that I have not shared with anyone, not even Brian or my family, and have carried it silently for quite some time so when things happen it is the first thought that comes to the forefront. However, after a very intimate conversation yesterday with someone at church who is close to me and whom I confide/trust in I felt like it was ok to share. Last week was an awful week for Brian and I. One of those weeks that I felt at times like putting my head under a pillow and not waking up until it was over. I literally felt like hell had launched an attack against me. Not only me but against my entire home and it was fierce. Starting on Monday I had to call 911 for Carston due to his indigestion of peanut butter and a protein shake mix that contains either eggs/egg product. His initial reaction was a rash appearing around his mouth which then went into full blown blister looking spots around his mouth, nose, and eyes. He then began showing signs of difficulty breathing and lips swelling so I immediately called his pediatrician who led me through the steps to administer his EpiPen and once that was completed, I had to call 911. The ambulance arrived and stabilized Carston to where I could transport him to CHOA myself. After 2 hours of monitoring, they determined that Carston had suffered Anaphylaxis. Anaphylaxis is a severe, potentially life-threatening allergic reaction. It can occur within seconds or minutes of exposure to something you are allergic to, such as peanuts or bee stings. Anaphylaxis causes your immune system to release a flood of chemicals that can cause you to go into shock — your blood pressure drops suddenly, and your airways narrow, blocking breathing. Signs and symptoms include a rapid, weak pulse; a skin rash; and nausea and vomiting. Common triggers include certain foods, some medications, insect venom and latex. Anaphylaxis requires an injection of epinephrine and a follow-up trip to an emergency room. If you do not have epinephrine, you need to go to an emergency room immediately. If anaphylaxis is not treated right away, it can be fatal. Following this event Monday, on Thursday, Carston was evaluated at Children’s/Marcus Autism Center to see if some of the symptoms he has been showing were signs of Autism or just typical toddler behavior. It was determined after several hours of intense evaluation that Carston does have Autism and is being referred to have either in-home therapy or inside a facility. These therapies will be on top of the hours that he will receive early intervention through the school system next week. Then here came Friday! Friday morning Carston woke up screaming to the top of his lungs curled up in a fetal position. I went in there and tried to calm him but his cry just got even more intense. I picked him up, tried consoling him, and there was no response . I thought maybe he was hungry and needed food. Tried feeding him, did not work. He kept balling over in his chair and crying like he was in pain. I then tried changing his diaper and once again he pulled his knees up and would not let me touch his stomach at all. I became very concerned as this had at this point went on for almost an hour and I felt that something was not right. So I called his pediatrician and she got him in. Upon her initial assessment she was ready to send him immediately to the ER. After us talking through the events of the morning and the past week we decided to give him a dose of Motrin and see if we could get him calm. After about 30 minutes he calmed enough to where she could check him over again. During this time Carston had a BM which she believed was causing the issue. She was still considering sending him to the ER to be checked but was willing to let me bring him home and let him rest to see how he did during the afternoon. All these events came atop Brian having a procedure done and suffering some minor issues afterwards and me worrying about him and hoping that it was not complications from the procedures. In these moments curled up on my couch with tears running down my face, the feeling of going through all this mentally by myself because I didn’t want anyone to have pity on me, feeling once again like I failed Carston somehow because I should have done more the day he was born to keep from all this happening, God reminded me “Laura I am in the midst of your there moment.” He dropped the nugget I shared on April 1st, Stop allowing people: Doctors, therapists, family, friends, etc to put a stamp where God puts a sticker. Don't make sense to you? Think of it like this, a stamp is permanent, a sticker is temporary meaning that the situation is subject to change! He began to speak to my broken heart. The broken place that out of pride and anger I was going to refuse to let anyone into this place, this there moment. He began to gently whisper how much He loves me. How although I still do not understand why all this has happened that He has a divine plan if I will just trust him. He has a purpose in the pain. He began to show me how much he has truly been in my ‘there moments’ these past 3 years. Why I am still in the “waiting” period to see all He wants to accomplish. You see, Timing in our season is important. Ecclesiastes 3:1 says that there is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven. What we must grasp ahold of in our “there” moments is that the secret to peace with God is to discover, accept, and appreciate God’s perfect timing. The danger is to doubt or resent God’s timing. This will lead to despair, rebellion, or moving ahead without his advice. I can look over this past week and truly see where I once again forgot to accept/appreciate not only what God is doing right now even though the process is hard. I took my eyes off Him. In closing, although yes, the work is completed in the spirit realm, and I am just waiting on the manifestation in the natural does not mean I am through the process. I am still going to have my “there moments” when I most of all need God to walk beside me. I desire and truly embrace the prayers, love, and support of those who are in this with us and if you do not want to be a part of the remainder of this process and our story, I understand, I release you, and wish you the absolute best in life. With that said, what is your “there” moment that you are currently walking through? Turn to HIM today and let him be all that you need. He even says: “Come to me all you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28 Much Love- Laura
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AuthorMy Name is Laura Perdue. I am 44 years old and married to my best friend, Brian Perdue and mommy to Carston Perdue. Brian and I reside in Woodstock Ga and serve on the action team of Fivestones Church in Holly Springs. Archives
July 2022
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